The King of Haumoana

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The Election of the King


On July 27th (the same day as the election for government) I set up my own little polling booth across from the Haumoana Hall. I sat in my polling booth on a cold and miserable day and campaigned hard. I resorted to bribing voters with a free "know your goat" fact sheet and lolly pops.

The voting form

I wanted the process of being elected King of Haumoana a fair and democratic process so I had all my opposition beheaded prior to the day and I gave the voters a choice on their voting form.

I had lots of great feedback on the day with many people coming over the road on a crappy day and voting in favour of me as King - it wasn't the free stuff I'm sure.

After manning my royale voting boothe from 9am - 5pm without a toilet break I retired to the throne room to count my votes.

In total I had 475 votes - that was made up of 29 Ok's, 35 Yes's, 245 Definitely's, 39 Honks, 86 Thumbs up and 41 special votes by email (and rising). There was one No vote from someone who tampered with the voting form and shall remain nameless eh Stevo Kennedy - Scanner man for Hawke's Bay Today. With that resounding 99.8 percent of the vote wanting me to be King it would be rude not too.

 

The opposition

But my campaign was not entirely unopposed. One block away, Zara Bradshaw, 10, and Sarah Fagan, 9, were chasing votes for the post of Queens of Haumoana. Unlike my strategy of bribing voters with sweets, the girls developed a detailed policy platform. They won 100 percent of the 48 votes cast.

But in the end the coldness of the day drove them home again - just as well because their policies were really good - something I hadn't thought of.

All in all it was great to meet so many loyal subjects, some of them bearing tithes of hot soup, coffee and good honest chocolate.

Andy - King of Haumoana

A Vote for Andy is a vote

The Shaw-Throp's

Ben of Shrimpton with his whanau casts his vote
in the official locked and sealed ballot box
Photos by Peter de Graaf

Archives

Why? / The Idea
Election Day / 2002 2005
Polar Plunge / 2002 2003 2004 2005
Know your Goat / Handy info
Training your rescue goat
The coat of arms / Colour in
Market Day / 2002 2003 2004
Membership / How to join
Media / Check out the frenzy
Name generator / Get a new one
Identify a T Rex in your garden

Make a door hanger

Excuse note for school
Know your lemon
How to avoid having your socks abducted by aliens

How to make a cheese helmet
How to spot a coffee addict
The sockodile Hunter
/ A guide to Feral Socks
Charlie Cheesepants / Cheese enhancer
King Andy's Handy Wrist Organiser / It's High-Tech and Cool
King Andy's Guide to Faking a Sickie


Latest Updates

Last Minute Election Campaign

I have added new licences and Charlie Cheesepants (turn your ordinary block of cheese into Charlie Cheesepants).

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2006 The year of the Lemon

Real lemon flavour - real lemon taste. With the juice of one whole lemon in every one. Lemons - at a lemon tree near you..

( Lemon )

 

© copyright 2003 Propartganda - Andy Heyward